When Heidi’s book, Fever Pitch, got nominated for a RITA earlier this year and she insisted that I was going to accompany her to New York for the ceremony, I realized that I was going to have to haul my suit out. I am lucky in that I have a job that does not even require me to wear a tie, let alone a suit, so the last time I had worn it was probably to one of Anna’s daddy-daughter dances. The last one of those was in 2012, and I’m pretty sure I just wore khakis that year. So to say that it gets worn a lot is pretty much an out-and-out lie.
I was not terribly surprised when, in March, I went to try on my suit pants and they did not fit. Not even close. One of the depressing things about your 40s is that you will never have a 20-something body ever again. It’s not been a secret that my weight has crept up, slowly but surely all through my 30s. After many false starts, I I figured it was time to really try to do something about it. After all, I had a goal, right? I wanted to fit into those suit pants by the end of July, right? I figured if I tried to lose 20 pounds in 4 months, with the right tools and attitude, I should really be able to do it. That’s not an unhealthy rate of weight loss, and it was reasonable. Why set yourself up for failure?
And I did pretty well, by and large. After about 6 weeks of using MyNetDiary.com, I had managed to lose about 10 pounds. But trying to get the second 10 pounds off was proving to be more difficult than the first. Add this to the fact that I had been less strict about what I ate and had a couple weeks of really bad eating, and well, I started making backward progress, then took the weight off again, then held steady. Work’s been extra stressful lately and my go to activity when I feel stressed or tired (which is pretty much all the time) is to eat – and I usually gravitate toward unhealthy choices.
It was becoming abundantly clear to me that I was not going to fit into those pants by the end of July. It was a huge disappointment for me and I kind of had to mourn this fact. But with the date rapidly approaching, I was going to have to come up with another plan.
I took the week off work this week just because so today we headed to Men’s Wearhouse, where I had bought my suit in 2010 to see if they could match the pants with the suit coat I had. Fortunately, since I had bought them as “suit separates” and not a whole suit, they could do that. Otherwise, I was going to be on the hook for a whole new suit. The guy took my measurements and went to find the pants I needed. He came back and said that he didn’t have the color I needed but could order them, but he gave me the same pants in a different color to try on. I about did a double take when I saw the waist size he gave me – higher than I have ever been, and after having dieted – and then had heart failure when I saw the price tag. $200 for pants I’m going to wear one evening? It seemed ridiculous to me and fortunately, Heidi concurred with that assessment.
So we went over to Younkers and we found pants much more in our price range. And since we had decided I wasn’t going to wear a suit, we found a cool blue shirt and a sharp red tie to go with it. And then she looked down at my black shoes that I wore because I knew I was going to be trying on dress pants. No no, these shoes will NEVER do, and I ended up with a new pair of shoes as well which, frankly, I needed because the ones I do have are in pretty sad shape. I even scored and picked up a fun summer shirt at 60% off that is lightweight and pink and makes me look good.
After all this, I spent just a little over $200, which would have only bought me a pair of pants at Men’s Wearhouse, but at Younkers bought me pants, two shirts, a tie and a pair of shoes. For failing, I was winning pretty hard at that point.
But there’s still the point of the waist circumference which I will not utter here for fear of sinking into the floor from embarrassment. I guess the only answer is to try again, start tracking everything I eat, make better choices, not let stress dictate what I eat and treat my body a little bit better again. Because I was really enjoying feeling better after losing that little bit of weight. As a friend of mine told me, it’s a marathon, not a sprint. Even though I didn’t manage to meet my goal of fitting into my suit pants in 4 months time, I did learn that I was consuming many many more calories in a day than I needed to.
With firm resolve, I will look even better in that pink shirt than I already do.