For no reason other than because I can and because I kind of want to see what happens, I’m going to go on a temporary break from Facebook.  It starts midnight tonight and I’m going to go for a week.  I thought about throwing Twitter in there too, but I don’t want to cut myself off too much too fast.  I may just read and not post.  Or not.  Who knows.

I’m not really sure what prompted this.  I know I’ve thought about it in the past and have never gone through with it.  I’ve done things like say to myself “I’m not going to post to my Facebook wall all week” only to break my resolve midday on Monday.  I think part of it is because more and more, it feels like a low grade addiction, like I go there to get a hit of…something.  I’m not sure what exactly it is, but more and more, it’s left me feeling more and more empty.  One thing I’ll say is that it’s not due to anybody on Facebook.  I think that sometimes, you have to look at things in your life and decide if they are adding to your life or subtracting from it.  Right now, Facebook is subtracting from it.  I feel like it’s an automatic surf whenever I sit down at my computer and a reflex action on my phone.

And to be honest, I feel like the connectedness that one supposedly gets there is just not the kind of connectedness I’m looking for.  For someone like me who longs to genuinely connect with people, Facebook’s not really the avenue for that.

The funny thing is I think that I’m not really searching for a different kind of connectedness, but rather I’m kind of searching for a contentment, and it’s something that’s only going to come from within me.  I’m not going to find it in snark or sarcasm or funny pictures.  I certainly won’t find it in quotes that are meant to be inspirational.  I think I have to find that and satisfy – or at least attempt to satisfy – that need by not constantly interacting.  I am an introvert, after all.  I need time alone to recharge.  I prefer one-on-one interaction to large groups.  Facebook, with its one-face-for-all-walks-of-life and constant stream of information has finally worn me down.

I think what I will do though, is write more here.  I’m going to try to blog at least once a day for the next week, so if you want your fix of Dan, you’ll have to come here and not go to Facebook. I can’t promise it’ll be brilliant, but it’ll be me, so it’ll be at least a little brilliant.  I won’t be posting links to posts on Facebook or Twitter so if you haven’t set up RSS feeds, now’s the time.  Or don’t.  Whatever people choose to do is okay with me.

I don’t think I’m going to give up Facebook for good – too many of my far-flung family members are there – but I have to be on a break from it to gain some perspective.  I am still happy to talk to people and see people, but it’ll have to be through e-mail or maybe you’ll have to call me or something.

I’m excited to try this but also apprehensive.  It may fail miserably, but I’m planning on uninstalling the Facebook app from my phone and removing the Facebook bookmark from my browser.  May as well program for success.  Wish me luck.

This entry was posted in facebook, internet, introspective, mental health, plans, reflection and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Face-less

  1. Ingrid J. Fox says:

    I fully support you in stepping away from Facebook, and I closely identify with what you’re saying. As an introvert I treasure deep, intimate relationships with people. I don’t enjoy large groups and I don’t enjoy broadcasting personal matters. So, that creates a Facebook experience where I post silly stuff and get silly comments in return. Great for comic relief; not so great for nurturing deep connections. I’m glad our paths have crossed again in life, and I look forward to reading your future blogs. Cheers to you!

    • Dan says:

      Thanks Ingrid. I generally hate it when people announce shit like this, as if to make it a big deal, but I decided to do it because I needed the accountability.

      I have never been one to have tons of acquaintances – that’s not emotionally satisfying for me and I’d rather spend my time cultivating deeper friendships with a handful of people. The thing with Facebook is that it basically requires me to have one reaction or one face for everybody in my life and that’s just not tenable. Plus I just don’t think we were meant to know every little thing that everyone in our life does and every random thought that crosses their mind.

      Thanks again for your comment and same back at you re: paths crossing again.

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